Her

Do you ever think of me in a positive light?
or is it always the night
when you have a drink and think
whatever happened to ‘what’s his name’ from back then
does your husband know you have an attraction to black men?
questions I shouldn’t be askin
reflection seems like perfection of what we had then
What happened?
you were my first love
and my last friend
memories of feelings I haven’t had since
it doesnt add up and it doesn’t make that much sense
it’s been too long
you’re too gone
I’m too strong to do wrong
but I can’t let go
and I can’t move on
congratulations, you’re a new mom
and congratulations to your dude, john
forgive me
I’m bringing up things you probably wouldn’t want her to remember
I swear I try to forget her
and how I would lift her
over my shoulders and throw her on the bed and then I would hold her, sober
just before October
Just before I got the chance to show her
what I should have told her
before we both got older
when I use to know her